Feeling Rather Empty!

I go way too deep into thought, with echoes - pink floyd, heard continuously in my head, I realise, I am still a homosapien and I do have a sensible clear mind. I made the choices, all the way from the 1st standard. I had designed my life into a non-charismatic boring marathon, in which I run till I find satisfaction. There was a problem. I found satisfaction way too soon. Iam pushing forward, but satisfaction creeps. There hasn`t been a day without me regretting taking up engineering as the tool to feed me in the future. But then, as arun says, "In life there should be no regrets!"! It was my choice of taking up engineering. No one forced me into it. But, I could not speak out. I did not know what was I interested in back then. I would`ve loved to take up law, or professional photography. I just did not speak out! I made the choice of listening to my parents, as always, believing that they would do it for my good.

Why are there so many engineers in our country? Is it something the country must be proud of or is it just wierd? Are there too many families which think, engineering is the only profession which can help them lead a normal life. Some other good but risky professions are there. There arises another sensible question! Are indians just satisfied with an average paying life style or are they just plainly dont want to take risks?

I always believe in a happy life. How much ever you earn, as long as you are happy, you are leading a beautiful life! I can say, the auto driver who took me from central station to home is leadin a good life. The guy sitting in the cash cabin of my college canteen is leading a good life. Is it really that way or is it just me?

I guess I am not a homosapien with a clear mind! But then who does?

Plus it is!

It was a great moment, when dad said, you can get a bike. It was so great that I heard A.R.Rahman`s backround score around me! It was really that kind of a moment. Cherish it always. And, I chose Hero honda passion plus. I have to admit I love the bike. The 1st day I took it to college, I knocked on heaven`s door! And, I made sue accompany me there. But, really it wasn`t that serious. Had heavy bruises. But, close to be run over by the truck which hit us. The bike was damaged. And, I always kind of feel that the bike saved me. I love it. I thought about all this. When I saw my bike getting washed after a long time in the rain.

I do sometimes feel bad, I dont maintain the bike properly. But the bike has always done its duty. All those days, when Im extremely angry that dad dint give me the car; the bike did reciprocate on my violent moves on the road. I`ve put it down 10 times, and still it runs flawlessly.

I never had great fascination towards powerful stylish travel wagons! I thought, passion was economic and for my use its always good. So decided on getting it. I`ve driven 13000kms in just over a year. Planning to take it to banglore. My dear passion, you`ve acknowledged every cut I took, every illegal turn I made and every sudden brakes I put on the signals. Thank you!

Flash news - Ram is jobless enough to see Sivaji for the 2nd time and again love it.

Flash news - Ram is addicted to psychedelic rock. Listening to pink floyd and the doors!

Rampi Says...

When the wish and the fear are exactly the same, we call the dream a nightmare!

Bengalooru!! Here I come!

I actually do like the place forits weather and air. I knows its getting way too polluted. But, it was Pune i wanted. Im convinced with Bengalooru. Okay, I`ll stop calling it that way! Banglore! Here I come! Yeah! I recieved my Date of Joining and Place of Joining from the HR! It was a phone call I made in the morning. And, yeah obviously Im happy about this. Will be joining work on july 16th. Thats quick. I thought it would be a lot later.

I`ll miss chennai. But, I`ve got to leave this place. Too many memories here. Good and bad! So, I`ll miss the good ones and forget the bad ones. Its really cool to say, "I miss chennai"! So, either way its good. And, there were romours that we were gonna be put up at chennai itself. So, I was kinda pissed for quite a while. But, satisfied now. Already hugged my mom and bid goodbye! So, yeah! Banglore! here i come!

I Forgive you!

Im in a mood to forgive and be forgiven. So, Im sorry for all that I`ve done to hurt you. And, if you want to confess for anything which you had done to me or for the society, this is the time!

The Real Boss!!

Saw Sivaji today. And loved it. No one can really beat the real boss. He`s damn smart in the movie, with the youthfulness bubbling in him. Back in 1995, Rajni movies were only for Rajini fans. Only the crazy Rajini fans used to watch it. Actually it was virtually impossible to get tickets in those days and I was in 5th std! But today, the movie is screened in all the 6 theatres of Satyam cinemas. There are only 5 or 6 theatres which are not running Sivaji.

It was a typical Rajini movie. It is said, "life is easier to live by when you lower your expectations to such a low level that they are already met". So, thats the way it is. But, if this same movie was taken with Vijay as the hero, I would`ve noticed people spitting on the clean Satyam theatre walls. But it was Rajini who made the film watchable and infact lovable. Awesome styles. The way he says "Cool!". And, yeah! Prabhudeva`s choreography for the Athiradee song is damn damn good. I`d say, its Rajini who made this movie, one of the best of his movies!

Thala... You are the best!!

Evolution

We evolved. From, the apes, to an upright human being. And, it doesn`t end there. We have been evolving, ever since, throughout our, decades, centuries and milleniums. And, to the extent of belief I have that, Im made up of, flesh and blood, I do believe that, I evolved too. Not by Darwin`s theory. In my own funny way. Actually, we all do evolve from the second we are born. From, a child which cried for no reason, I evolved to a random school going guy, who hated education; from a hopeless moron, who went for a movie, 2 days before the 12th maths exam, to a guy who is expecting the date of joining from the company which recruited him. Added, are the maturity, ability to actually think and a helluva lot of fat. Yeah, damn right! We all do evolve.

Life has been an awkward rollercoaster ride, without the saftey belt(s)! Really. Too many risks and too many perceptions. I realised, life was gonna be hard, when I did the watchman job for a very dear friend, when he did his romance. It was my 12th coaching class, and it was 5:30 in the morning. And, my teachers appreciated me, when I answered them perfectly in the class. Our, physics sir used to say stories in the middle of the class for relaxations. It was crap. We slept anyway! So, this was the part of the class, when we gave break to the sleeping.One day, he started....

Physics Sir : Krishna theva raja, asked thenali what was the most pleasureful thing in the world.
And, from back of the class, a voice came to life. Good guess! It was me.
I : To Pee!
Physics sir: yeah yeah!

Then he started teaching. No sign of me! Some of my friends, who slept even through the story telling sessions, asked me, howcome I was so brilliant to answer such questions. I just blushed and went back to sleep. School was fun; especially coz, I dint study.

But, college was different. College, was the only place, where I could not study and dont feel guilty about it. So, it all happened. I marched passed the enormously short semesters on a Clear-Flunk basis. Yeah. I clear one paper and flunk in other. But, apparently it did work out. Me, being someone, who believes, "whatever happens to you, is only because of you; doesn`t matter if its good or bad", will say that, I was responsible for what I am today. From the position in which I am now, I will not give you the wrong perception of me that, Im good and disciplined and that, Im someone who loves to study and excel in everything. Im the same old guys, who studies, exactly 2 days before the exam and scores a modest 60%, eventhough I dont have anymore exams to write.

I was the kind of guy, who prays exactly on the day of the exam, for which the preparation was minimum. And, I also have been the guy who cursed god for the bad results. And, when I realised, it was me, I stopped yelling at those immovable, colourful photographs of beautiful people with a helluva lot of jewellary. I can describe myself as a semi-aethists. Or, as my friend joobie puts it, I believe in god, but not in relegions. I believe in the big bang. But, I think a superior force made it happen. So, the semi-aethist title!

This has turned out to be a long long post. And, now, I`ve got to do the most pleasureful thing in the whole world.

100 not out!

This is the 100th post! Yippee! I dont believe I`ve written a 100 times to post in this blog. Started 8 months ago, this blog was all about me. Ramprasad Arunachalam, potentially fit for nothing. And, now, I`ve written 100 posts. Wow! OK! Nothing special about it though! And, yeah, I`ll still be continuing.

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Me, and the guys had gone to pondy, auroville, yesterday, in search of enlightment. Naah! We, just visited the ashram! It was fun! Was like going for a long long drive, on a hot hot day. The plan was to stay for a coupla days. But, weather and the quality of the rooms, made us to come back the same day. It was damn tiring at the end of the day!
But, we had fun - Bottomline!

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Sometimes, old movies are beautiful! I loved the Rear Window, 12 angry men and Its a wonderful life. But, today, I saw a Tamil movie called "Punnagai"- meaning a smile. It was so so so damn beautiful! Its about 4 friends from college, taking up different routes in life. Sometimes, it astonishes me, of how well the directors of those days have thought. Its been a long time since I enjoyed an old Tamil movie. It was fun watching the movie.

Rampi Says...

Wisdom is nothing but cleverness, with all the guts kicked out.

I`ve been watching too much of sports, that I started wondering, the stars` faces were familiar. Here are my findings. But they just may not be accurate.




Depp and nadal! Might not be very obvious.



Wayne Rooney and Mark Boucher. Mark boucher should have a hari cut for the rooney look!



Federer and Quentin Tarantino. Awesome resemblance!

Ana!

Having learnt the sport for just more than 4 years, 1 thing that always strikes to me is, its beauty and the way in which you never give up. Im talking about tennis. A fabulous sport. The opponent, drops one near the net, and you run with your full heart to play the shot. And, this is the only game of my knowledge in which you can never give up! In cricket, 7 runs remaining of 1 ball - not possible, in football, 4 goals in 1 minute - not possible, same goes for hockey and basketball. This is the only game in which, even if your opponent has 3 match points, you can fight back and with considerable talent, actually win the game. Thats the beauty of the game.

I`ve been watching the french open. Yeah, I respect Justine Henin. She plays with class. But, this beauty, Ana Ivanovic, Has stolem my heart. Seriously! She looks good and plays pretty good. She`s a girl from Serbia and I was astonished by a piece of info i got from the match commentary. She used to practise, in an empty swimming pool, with a carpet on the floor. Geez!! Thats hard work. I now feel emotionless for all the back-breaking sessions my coach gave me during those coaching days! And, most of all, she look good! She talks good english! I watched the match in which she came down hopelessly, despite of me yelling, "c`mon fight!fight!" at the television. Its hard to look at beautiful tennis playing women losing. But, she was nervous, maybe a justification. But, she deserves it.

Over You!

I`ve been addicted to this Chris Daughtry song - over you. Awesome number. I heard his its not over on tv and downloaded the whole album. I couldn`t find the video. So, here goes the lyrics.

Now that it’s all said and done
I can’t believe you were the one
To build me up and tear me down
Like an old abandoned house
What you said when you left
Just left me cold and out of breath
I fell too far, was in way too deep
Guess I let you get the best of meeee

Well I never saw it coming
I should have started running
A long, time agooo!
And I never thought I’d doubt you
I’m better off without you
More than you, more than you know
I’m slowly getting closure
I guess it’s really over
I’m finally gettin’ better
Now I’m picking up the pieces
From spending all of these years
Putting my heart back together
‘Cause the day I thought I’d never get through
I got over you!!!


You took a hammer to these walls
Dragged the memories down the hall
Packed your bags and walked away
There was nothing I could say,
And when you slammed the front door shut
A lot of other’s opened up
So did my eyes so I could see
That you never were the best for meee


Well I never saw it coming
I should have started running
A long, time agooo!
And I never thought I’d doubt you
I’m better off without you
More than you, more than you know
I’m slowly getting closure
I guess it’s really over
I’m finally getting’ better
Now I’m picking up the pieces
From spending all of these years
Putting my heart back together
‘Cause the day I thought I’d never get through
I got over you!!!

Awesome song. Get your hands on it as soon as possible!

Rampi Says...

Every free minute, is a short story, with a happy ending!

Engineer Finally!

Today, I have officially become an engineer, with the results out, and me scoring 78%! For all those who know me, 78% is not my kind of percentage. And, dad was all enthusiastic when i told him this! Yeah obviously! For a man, who had thought that his son, would`nt clear the 12th std, his son finishing engineering, should have been a good feeling. But, otherwise, it was just another day. Had dinner with the guys at a veg restaurant, vegetarian one. Ate till the point where the oesophages touches the modula oblangada (dont care if the spelling is wrong!), if at all they touch each other! And, yeah, we had good fun today, calling each other engineers. Its is an accomplishment. aint it?

Rampi Says...

The secret behind relaxed people is, laziness!

- The Hindu, Metro Plus, Grafitti.

Beau Nuits!!

It was 11pm that night. I wanted to go to bed. I was desperate. But, I wasnt sleepy. My mom held my hand, tight, so I wouldnt run away! All, I wanted was to get a good night sleep. Then, mom`s face turned red and she yelled. She yelled at the hieght of her voice. I dint budge at all. Then, she pinched me under my arm! Ouch! That hurt! I had tears in my eyes. She came close to me and said "Finish this chapter and go to sleep!". I had to! And, thats the story of me getting the 23rd rank in the quaterly exams of 1993! And, I utterly burst out laughing when I think about these things that happened in my school days! Yeah, the good old days, when I had to fake studying to get crackers for Diwali, when I had to pursue my parents not to go for the parent-teacher meeting(Damn!! it never worked!!).

And, today, its 1 am, mom just woke up and remindes me that I had to sleep! I can call myself nocturnal. As, I have been for the past 8 months. But, it shouln`t be this way. What the hell?? I`ll be a normal S/W engineering guy, who works 14 hrs a day, partying in the night, after 2 months now! So, nowadays, Im kinda used to being bored, getting all the sleep I want. You know what I mean! This post couldn`t be getting more boring. Okay, chill out people! ciao.

P.S. : If you are wondering what the title meant, it means beautiful nights in french.

Dreamland blues!

Sometimes, you wake up with a refreshing mood, with your mind all eared up of doing the things you`ve planned to do! Today, the exact opposite happened to me! It was a stupid dream. The most pathetic dream. Yes! I dreamt today morning at 9! I was pleading to someone for something, which would probably come for the rest of my life! But,thats somethin which I would never do. Even if it cost my life, I wouldn`t beg for it to someone! I just hated that dream. Yeah, it is qualified to be a nightmare.

Apparently, I had another dream. Which I kinda enjoyed. In this one, I was talking to a friend who is a fellow candidate to be placed in the same company as I am! He tells me, the company has sent us a brand new, Lenovo, laptop with a core 2 duo! Wow, mann! Thats great! Then, I come home, I find the laptop. Put it aside and call sue to tell him, what my company does and his company doesnt! Then I wake up for a second, ask myself if this is real, then fall asleep. I get the answer in the dream, that it is. Im happy in my dream! Damn!! Then after an hour, I wake up and realise that it was just a dream!

Thus, the day gets spoiled, coz,
1. I did something which i wud never do, in my dream, and
2. I was disappointed that, the other dream was not true!

Flash news: Ram bought the gmat book. Not yet studying, but its a start!

Rampi Says...

Life`s like a derailed train coming down on you. You`d rather have a chocolate cake, having fun while it does, than be frightened the whole time!

- "that 70`s show"

You put me to sleep everynight man!! Thanks!

I have been blogging for over 7 or 8 months now, and Ive never dedicated a post for my favorite musician! So this one goes for him! Rahman! You all love him. For, me, his music just defines my thoughts. I can easily spend hours listening to him!

My sister, in chicago, is goin for the june 9th concert there. Ive never been to a Rahman concert. Id love to be there. There isnt any facts that I`d like to say about him. I just wanna dedicate this post to him! He`s just as famous and everyone knows about him!